Nightmare Job Interviews

My most embarrassing job interview occurred inevitably for a job I really wanted – teaching for a British university in China with a decent salary, 30 weeks’ holiday, free accommodation and flights home every holiday – perfect!

The time for the Skype interview arrived and that was when I realized I had no internet connection in my room at my university in England.  I quickly picked up the phone to contact the interviewers to explain the problem and then realized I had no phone signal either, so I ran to another part of the uni where the phone registered two bars and I dialled.  The head of department interviewing me made it clear during a very uncomfortable phone call that I’d better make sure I had an internet connection for the rescheduled interview the following day; feeling hot, sweaty, clammy, and nauseous at the same time, I assured her that everything would be fine.

The time for the rearranged interview arrived and there I was sat behind my desk in my lecture theatre with a fast internet connection.  The interviewers seemed to be as relieved as I was when we looked at each other on the screens – the head of department introduced me to the head of curriculum who was sat beside her.  Everything seemed to be going well when all of a sudden, the lights started to dim – I’d forgotten that my lecture theatre had motion-activated lighting that switched off if there was no movement in the room.  I tried to look normal as I flapped my arms like a bird and pretended that I hadn’t noticed the startled expressions on the interviewers’ faces.  The lights continued to dim so I had to just explain what the problem was and ask them if they wouldn’t mind me going for a quick run around my classroom every now and again during the interview.  I got back from my first lap of the lecture hall and noticed my interviewers were both looking down, their shoulders trembling with the effort they were making not to laugh out loud. The interview went ok except for the fact that I had to stop every eight minutes to go for a run - it lasted an hour.  I think I was more surprised than anyone when I got the job.   By Delv